Parents Like Me! > FAQs

Grandcarers often have many questions about a variety of topics, such as the availability of services, custody and access arrangements, etc. Some of these questions can be answered here.

Important! Our replies are posted in response to specific questions and have been formulated solely on the information provided. As such, they may not apply to the specific circumstances of another individual, or family. Thus, the information provided is not intended as a substitute for professional consultation.

Please refer to the following list of the most frequently asked questions, and the answers we have provided:

I have legal custody of my granddaughter. Can I become her foster parent so I can get the Relative Carer and Foster Carer Subsidy?
No, foster parents are used only in situations where the State (i.e., child protection authority) has temporary or permanent custody of the child. If you have legal custody there can be no foster payments under current legislation. However, you are entitled to seek child support from both parents. Also, in addition to any personal pension or health care cards you (or your grandchild) may receive, or be eligible to receive, you may qualify for Family Tax Benefits (Parts A and/or B). In the first instance, we suggest you contact a Family Assistance Office and ask to speak to the Centrelink Grandparent Adviser (0437 485 307) to discuss your specific circumstances.
I have just taken my grandchildren into my home. Should I consult a lawyer?
Assuming parental care of your grandchildren is a serious matter and there are many legal, and other issues, that need to be considered. Also, the answers to these matters can vary depending upon your individual circumstances, so independent advice that considers these is advisable.
Can my grandchild’s biological parent(s) take the child from my home when I have told them “no”?
It depends on the children’s legal status. You have full rights to say “no” only if you have adopted the children: Although, even if you have legal custody, the parents may be granted the right to visit the children by court order. However, they could still take them without your consent, even if there is no court order. If they do so, and you fear for their safety, the Police need to be informed. If the State has custody of the children in your care, the biological parent cannot take them without the agreement of the Department, or a court order. Again, if they do so the Department and the Police need to be informed.
If you have not adopted the child(ren), and neither you nor the Department has either legal custody or a temporary court injunction preventing the child(ren)’s removal, then the biological parent(s) could take back the child(ren) without your consent. If they do so, and you fear for their safety, you need to contact the Department for Child Protection to intervene.
I have been the foster carer of one of my grandchildren for two years but we have rarely heard from the Department. What do I do, my granddaughter needs help but I don’t know who to contact?
Contact the Department for Child Protection Office with whom you had negotiations when grandchild came into your care. Ask Reception for the name of case worker and discuss issues with this person. It is the responsibility of the Department to provide services that are deemed necessary.
I am struggling financially to provide for my three grandchildren but I don’t seem to be eligible for a lot of the benefits. Is there someone I can contact to discuss my options?
- Centrelink Grandparent Liaison Officer 1800 245 965
- Wanslea Family Services Grandcare 1800 008 323
How do I claim Family Assistance?
To claim Family Assistance you’ll need to complete the appropriate claim form. You can get this form by visiting any Family Assistance Office or by calling 13 1650. The claim form should be completed and returned to the Family Assistance Office. However, If you already get Family Tax Benefit for a child, you can claim the Child Care Benefit over the phone, and you do not need to complete the additional claim form.
What do I tell the children about their parent’s drug use?
It is common for children to blame themselves for their parent’s substance abuse. Children may justify feelings of guilt by creating stories such as “Mummy went away because I was always naughty”. Exploring these stories of blame with the children and gently challenging their assumptions can save them from undeserved guilt and distress.

Illicit drugs can influence people to do things they would never normally do and the drugs may be put ahead of everything else, including their children. Children may need to be reassured that although their parents used substances they were still loved by them. It is helpful for children to be told that they did not cause their parent’s drug problems and that they were powerless to make them stop.

Finally, it is important to remember that some of these children may have taken on a care giving role for their parents and siblings, and as a result, developed a sense of guilt and responsibility well beyond their years. These feelings may take a while to resolve
Should I take the children to visit their parent in prison?
Deciding whether children should visit their parent in prison can be a difficult decision, and the right answer may vary from child to child. In making a decision, it is helpful to concentrate on what is best for the child. Carers may be worried that seeing a parent incarcerated could be frightening and upsetting for a child. However, visiting can assist children to cope with separation by helping them understand what has happened to their parent, and where they are. For some children it may be an opportunity to get to know their parent while they are not affected by drugs.
The parents are arriving under the influence of alcohol or drugs or both for their access visit with our grandchildren, or they do not turn up at all. What should I do?
Under no circumstances allow the children to be with parents who are obviously affected by drugs and alcohol. In instances where the child(ren) are in the care of the CEO of Department for Child Protection advise your Case Worker, as soon as possible of this situation. In all cases it is advisable to keep a record of all access visits.
In answer to the second part of the question, it is not uncommon for children to misbehave when parents do not turn up for their access visit. In this event It is helpful to discuss this situation with other carers and your counsellor.

If you care informally for your grandchild(ren) we suggest you seek advice from the Department for Child Protection and/or Grandcare.

Send a question

If you have a question that has not been answered previously, we encourage you to email your question to us at h.wichmann@curtin.edu.au and we will try to post a reply on the website as soon as possible.

Important! Our replies can only be of a general nature and the information provided is not intended as a substitute for professional consultation. Please note: (1) there may be delays in replying to your question as this section is only moderated once a week. (2) your question and our reply will be posted in the FAQ section.